Words ......

" I missed you today ..... "

he used to wisper every day on our first call after work ..
and ..
I used to believe him ....

A long lost memory ....

The weirdest thing has happened to me this morning ..
On my way to work I sow this guy .. who had the exact eyes of my ex-fiancée
!!!!!

I got frozen to my spot and as I was shielded behind my sun glasses, I couldn't stop staring at him ..

and I almost cried ......
It all came back to me .. as it was never gone ..

I thought I forgot already ..
It's been more than three years now, and definitely I'm not even a little bit sorry I left him ..

The problem is , I just miss who I was back then ..
The simple dreamy optimistic girl I used to be ..
I miss how I used to feel ..
How happy and thrilled I was ..
In love for the first - and only - time in my life ..
Loving life to its tiniest detail ..

No one's ever understood how deep was his effect on my feelings – not even him I guess – it was really strange and inexplicable, how he managed - in just couple of weeks - to occupy my every thought , control my every heart beat and be the very center of my whole world ..

In couple of more weeks I found out what a jerk he was, broke up with him and most importantly broke my own heart irreparably..

Turned into a shaken tense skeptical shadow of my old self ..
Tortured every guy who was foolish enough to dare and approach me afterwards, just because I'm too afraid ..

All of a sudden he came into my life, all of a sudden he left and all of a sudden a tiny occurrence made me relive it all over again ..

God .... I can't believe what an idiot I am !!